How to Have an Eye Orgasm Every Time 

My father murdered us all in our beds

but it was okay because he

left a nightlight on & read us

a bedtime story first

which always ended happily ever after.

My mother was a figment of my imagination.

She existed at the bottom of peanut butter jars

& inside of eggs.

To feel her I had to wet my finger & stick it

inside of electric outlets.

But don't misunderstand what I'm saying
as a linguistic form of cystic fibrosis.
I am looking for no man or woman’s pity.

Mounted on a central spindle with a handle,

I learned early that you can look your best 

with just the right amount of adhesive.

It’s up to you to make yourself a worthy 

member of society

either as a bug spray or an air conditioner;

it doesn't matter what.

When will I begin my second pregnancy?
When should I begin potty training?

When do I begin to lose all hope?

These are badly worded questions.

You have to imagine a world lit by fire 

in which most people are cold.

You have to make the most ambitious effort

at the most crucial stage of development

to reverse your image. 

In other words, the yellow journey is taken by the rider

who is not the winner.

Despite over a century of interest,

all the zebras galloped out of New Orleans

as early as 1875.

They’d had enough. 
Still, there’s a zebra behind every door.